5/04/2005

Thinking about Ohio and shit.




When I was talking about that fucking cripple Jerry Springer I hit upon the idea of making a commitment to only bitching about things or people if I had a solution to the quandary or human puzzle myself. In the spirit of thoroughness, and in honor of those innocents who biffed it at the hands of Nixon's feddayim back then, I have gone through all my old posts and come up with solutions to any problem that I have bitched about. here we go:

1. Shoot him.
2. Shoot him.
3. Pop him execution-style
4. Whack her. One inna heart, one inna head.
5. Cap him
6. Cap him too.
7. Pop him through a pillow for low-noise.
8. Shoot him.
9. Waste him and his minions in a fiery melee
10. One upstairs, one in th' chest.
11. Use a silencer for this tricky takedown.
12. Plug him.
13. Wax her. And her little dog. Actually, never mind the dog. In fact, if the dog gets hurt it's off.
14. Shoot him.
15. Hollowpoints for this nightmare.
16. Execution-style slaying.
17. Waste him.
18. Wing him and let the carrion birds finish the work.
19-24. Shoot them.
25. Terminate with extreme prejudice.
26. Take down the leader; the rest will fall.
27. Pop her and roll her into the canal.
28. Plug him.
29. Cap them.
30. Blast him till he looks like a swiss cheese.
31. Shoot him.
32. Shoot him.
33. Use speedloader and don't stop until the ground is awash in smoking shells.
34. Back of the head.
35. Waste her.
36. Waste him.
37. Pistolwhip, expose lies, then shoot to kill.
38. Whack him execution style through an empty Pepsi 2-liter for low-noise.
39. Whack him rub-a-dub style.
40. And finally, blast them both.

I think that takes care of the solutions for all my blog entries.

thank you and good night.


 Posted by Hello

1 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well, I laughed. I hope that makes me a bad person.

7:05 AM  

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