4/07/2005

What if the J-Lo naming convention became standard?







Can you identify these money hip hop playaz? Hint: most are on my blog somewherez. Winner getz a capon:

H-Kiss
R-Nix
P-Wolf
B-Light
M-Stew
H-Clint
T-Bolt
K-Bry
P-Pot (ha ha ha ha)
G-Schroed
P-Hilt
B-Getz
C-Mans (that's hard. Think stabbing with a fork)

and finally,

A-Hit

A-Hit, H-Kiss and P-Pot actually sound like hip hop names, huh? That's "bananas, dog." B-Light would be good too. It obviously has to be B-Lite, though, doesn't it? here's my cred, yo: I took a bus through South Central a month after the riots by mistake.

Hey, come on. How the hell else you gonna get from Manhattan Beach to La Mirada?

I was once picked up by my face. You know what they never put in the movies? The inadvertent pissing of oneself.

Sal the Feist's hip hop name is Scoop Doggy Poop. That's a tough, fleabitten little snit right there.

Band name I thought of today: Attack Poodle. Doesn't that sound tough? I've been warming to Gutbucket. It's sort of a glamorous thing, you know?

skeleton wal ksint o abar an dask sfor ab eer an dam op.

This post isn't dirty enough. Fuck. Ass. Truth. Peace. Beauty. Shit. There, that's all of the current dirty words I can think of. Oh- Reading.

4 Comments:

Anonymous Kevin of Devon said...

0 COMMENTS, 0 COMMENTS, 0 COMMENTS. Post after post. It's just too sad. Sadder than your fucking funny story about Michael Bolton and David Sanborn. 0 COMMENTS. Well, not any more Bobby.

9:34 AM  
Blogger Bobby Lightfoot said...

It is *sniff* really sad that *sniff* no one is commenting on my brilliant *gulp* prose, Kevin of Devon.

I really appreciate that you'd take the time to *sigh* comment on my blog.

I think that *sniff* the reason no one else does IS BECAUSE EVERYBODY ON THE FACE OF THIS SHITSTAIN PLANET IS A FUCKING CUNT. YOU FUCKERS. YOU BETTER HOPE I NEVER GET A RIFLE AND A WATERTOWER AT THE SAME TIME. I'LL MOW YOU DOWN LIKE THE FUCKING CATTLE YOU ARE. BLAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

Anyway, thanks K of D. Hopefully you'll keep up with my madcap adventures.

8:44 PM  
Blogger CrayolaThief said...

The reason I don't comment very often is because I'm usually laughing so hard by the end of each post that I fall over & my foot becomes tangled in the computer cord & wrenches it out of its socket. And then sparks from the wall socket catch the curtains on fire & the apartment burns down & the firemen refuse to put it out because they're feuding over jurisdiction. So I try putting it out myself with milkbottles & spit, & I get a hernia from the effort & am rushed to the emergency room where the doctor refuses to admit anything decent came of 1979, so naturally I refuse treatment & end up dying of some weird gangrenous infection that smells like almonds. So that's why I don't comment very often.

2:50 AM  
Blogger Bobby Lightfoot said...

sounds like a couple relationships i've had.

10:55 PM  

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