Polesmokin' Neocon Felcheteers Number Like a Zillion or something: Tom Fucking DeLay

God, I feel unequal to this task. I don't know where to start. You know, if I can topple an evil as ancient and powerful as fucking Santa Claus, you'd think I wouldn't tremble at taking on this little nipplehair.

Truth is, I'm scared. I'm a little scared. I'm going to take a deep breath and do this, but I hope it's not my last. Christ knows I might start feeling little pinpricks out of the blue in my ass and then the life will be snatched out of me by evil spirits. Lots of people who cross Tom DeLays path speak of pinpricks in the ass.

Whenever I feel like the children are getting the better of me and I feel bested and defeated and resentful, I just remind myself of the fact that the world of tomorrow is being constructed by people like Tom DeLay. That'll be their punishment, ultimately. Poor little bastards. This might, in fact, be a useful exercise in expanding my compassion for Them.

Shit. I just don't know if I can do this.

All right. Here goes nothing.

TOM DE FUCKING LAY!!!!!!!!!! TOM FUCKING DELAY!!!!!!!!! OH MY FUCKING CHRIST! WHERE TO START?? DO WE START WITH THE SHEER, UNMITIGATED EVIL?? WITH THE BACKROOM DEALINGS?? THE ENDLESS LIES THAT STRETCH INTO THE DISTANCE LIKE A YELLOW BRICK ROAD OF HATE, DECEIT AND PUKE?

Where on earth do we start with this fucking monster?

Fuck. I felt like I was getting somewhere and then I lowercased it and I lost my mojo.

Jesus, gang. I'm going to have to come back to Tom.

God, I feel small.