10/03/2005

A Brief Aside On Th' Job Market

Oh, those goddamn portal pages, you know? Like MSN 'n' Charter 'n' them? Relationship and dieting advice? The Ten Hot Growing Jobs?

A'ight- here's the reality, diggity. Here's Bobby Lightfoot's Ten Growth Careers for yer asses:

1. Polar Icecap Measuring Dude- you get a yardstick. Trust me, it's enough.
2. Bootlicking Neocon Toadie.
3. Hashslinger
4. Soldier
5. Kyoto Treaty Abstainer
6. Fry Maker
7. Customer Service Phone Dude (work on that Indian accent)
8. Sex Professional
9. Wait, there's only 8. Sorry.

Oh, dieting tip- piss is sterile. Don't eat shit.

Relationship advice- don't forget you're an asshole. That way when you're treated like one you won't spring a god damn leak yo.

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